Not To Be Confused With A Three Hour Cruise

Those castaways always wanted to go home but, believe me, after the four hour meal we had on Sunday, no one wanted to go home. It was just too damn good.

Earlier in the week some old family friends had called and we all decided to get together for a nice big Sunday dinner at Patricia's in the Bronx. Have you been there? If you have, then you know and you can stop reading this post. If not, get in a car, on a train, on a ship or on a plane and get yourself there as quickly as you can.

They have a great menu but they also have the meal of all meals--yes kids, they do a big old fashioned Italian family style meal. Which is what we ordered.

It's epic.

You start out with super thin crust pizza. Then come the meat and cheese plates--prosciutto, mortadella, sopprasetta, smoked mozzarella, fresh mozzarella and, of course, some olives for color. Here come the platters of fried calamari that is so damn fresh and delicious you swear that you're never ordering it anywhere else again. Then the big steaming bowls of eggplant, goat cheese and sliced steak in a gorgeous gravy arrive. While you're staring at that and wondering if these pants were such a good idea, along come the big steaming bowls of shrimp and hot peppers. Oh God--I'm in heaven. It's hard to suppress the desire to ask for bread to dunk in all of the gravy but, like any good marathoner, you dig your heals in and don't break your stride. What's that smell? Is it? Could it be? Outrageously gorgeous bowls of mussels steamed in tomatoes and garlic.

Whew. That was delicious. I'm going to pour myself another glass of wine (by the way--the wine is included in the price) and take a rest before we go home.

Really, who the hell did I think I was kidding? We were nowhere near done.

After a little break, along came the platters of cavatelli with a roasted cherry tomato sauce and shaved parmesan cheese. Then comes the beggars purses--arguably the best part of the meal. Little lovely pouches of fresh ricotta cheese in the most delicate pasta with wild mushrooms, peas and a nice light pink sauce. Outrageous. And just in case there hasn't been enough protein in your meal, please pass the plate of grilled lamb chops. Oh and yes, you might as well pass the grilled beef tenderloin while you're at it.

Cappuccino anyone? Espresso? You'll need it to go along with the cinnamon zepoles and Nutella puffs that they just put down on the table.

I think Pop and John were discussing just how they were going to be able to unbutton their pants and still make it out to the car.

Needless to say we had leftovers. The mussels went to New Boy since he lives and breathes for seafood. The eggplant ended up tossed with some ziti and served for lunch at Greyston Bakery on Monday. The cold meats, cheeses and cavatelli have been being picked at all week and are, sadly, almost gone.

Anyone want to meet me there this Sunday?

P.S. On a totally unrelated subject, it always amazes me just how much damage you can do to your knees without ripping your pants. If anyone is looking for the world's greatest uneven sidewalk, I found it last night and would be happy to take you on a tour. Just make sure you wear knee pads and a helmet.